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Dealing with School Struggles as a Divorced Parent

 Posted on November 27, 2017 in Child Custody

Lombard family law attorneysMany have said that being a parent is the hardest job in the world. It is nearly impossible to know how to respond to every challenge parenthood throws at you—especially when you are co-parenting your children with an ex-spouse. You may be unsure of how to work with your former partner in creating the best life possible for your children.

Problems at school present a variety of issues for many parents. Some children go through phases where they are getting in trouble or letting their grades drop, How should divorced parents deal with school issues such as these? There is unfortunately no owner’s manual for children and no one-size-fits-all way to raise them. However, following a few simple pieces of advice can help you and your ex-spouse come together to do what is best for your children.

Be Honest and Transparent With the Other Parent

Even if you are the primary guardian of the child, it is best to notify the other parent of school problems as soon as they arise. This helps both parents be on the same page and allows the other parent to hold the child accountable for his or her actions. Of course, if the other parent has a history of abuse or does not have any legal custody of the child, it may be best not to involve them.

Reach Out to Your Child’s Teacher

Often a child’s teacher is a neutral third-party observer to the child’s problems. He or she may be able to help identify triggers to the behavior and help you come up solutions. If you are not already, make sure both parents are on the school’s mailing list and have access to any online grades or reports that may be available. Give the school and your child’s teacher both parents’ email addresses and phone numbers.

Present a United Front

Children thrive when they have consistent expectations. Try to agree with your ex on a set of rules and behavior guidelines for your child. Having different rules in the different houses can make it difficult for children to follow them. For example, when one parent allows the child to skip homework and the other does not, it can create resentment, tension, and confusion for both the child and the adults.

Keep Your Emotions in Check

Co-parenting is extremely difficult. After all, if two people are divorced it probably means that they do not see eye-to-eye. However, you should avoid fighting in front of your child. It is important to keep the focus on your child’s needs and stay away from blaming or attacking the other parent. Try to focus on solutions instead. 

Let Us Help

If your child is struggling in school and you are not sure how to approach the issue with your ex-spouse, an experienced Lombard family law attorney may be able to offer guidance. Call 630-426-0169 and let us help you provide the best possible future for your child.



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