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Emotional Affairs Count as Cheating

Posted on in Divorce

Infidelity, while it may seem an overplayed meme in modern society, is still one of the most common reasons for divorce in America. According to InfidelityFacts.com, only 31 percent of American marriages last after an affair has "been admitted to or discovered," and the divorce rate in America is just over 50 percent. Despite the risks associated with having an affair, the majority of people in long-term committed relationships, at least according to InfidelityFacts.com, admit to being unfaithful. This percentage is just slightly higher for men (57 percent) than for women (54 percent), but the fact that both percentages are over half may be shocking. The average length of an affair is about two years.  

And yet an affair may not just be the actual physical act of cheating. The idea of an emotional affair is, in some cases, even more offensive than physical. In more than 40 percent of American marriages, "one or both spouses admit to infidelity, either physical or emotional," according to InfidelityFacts.com.

So what is an emotional affair? According to Oprah.com, it’s exactly what it sounds like. "Many people convince themselves that as long as there’s no sex, it’s not an affair. But it is," writes Dr. Gail Saltz. It "has to do with the amount of emotional energy that you pout into the other person and are no longer giving your partner." So what determines an emotional affair, and what’s just a friendship with a person of the opposite sex?

According to Saltz, writing for Oprah.com, some warning signs are as follows:

  • if you keep most meetings or conversations secret from your partner
  • when you say or do things with someone you’d never do in front of or with your spouse
  • when you make it a point to arrange one-on-one time with someone else
  • when you share things with someone that you don’t share with your partner

If your spouse is having an emotional affair, that’s considered reason enough for divorce in Illinois. Don’t go through it alone. Contact a dedicated Illinois divorce attorney today.


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