Posted on March 26, 2018 in Divorce

Divorce is a tough process for anyone. After all, no one gets married with the intent to someday divorce. Women sometimes experience different challenges during divorce than men do. There is no perfect way to end your marriage, but there are some things you can do to minimize your stress and help the process go more smoothly.

Take Care of Your Needs

Women often put other’s wants before their own. Wives and mothers are sometimes so busy looking after others that they rarely stop to think about their own needs. According to the Holmes-Rahe Stress Inventory, getting divorced is the second-most stressful life even a person can experience. Only the death of a spouse is considered to be a more stressful life event. During this time, it is important to charge your emotional battery. Whether that means going to the spa, out to lunch with friends, or sitting in your own backyard with a good book, do not be afraid to take time to de-stress while your divorce is ongoing.

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 Posted on March 22, 2018 in Estate Planning

Although it has been nearly 13 years since she passed away, many people still remember the name Teri Schiavo from the famous right-to-die legal case which spanned from 1990 to 2005. Schiavo was only 26 years old when she suffered cardiac arrest which left her in a persistent vegetative state. Although the young woman was alive, doctors explained that she would probably never gain full consciousness.

Schiavo’s husband felt that his wife would not have wanted to be kept alive through machines and fed through feeding tubes and requested that his wife have her feeding tube removed. The woman’s parents fervently disagreed with this plan and battled in court to keep their daughter alive. The case sparked increased interest in advance directive measures that allow a person to ensure their wishes regarding medical treatment will be followed in the event they are incapacitated.

Half of Elderly Hospital Patients Unable to Communicate Wishes

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 Posted on March 20, 2018 in Divorce

Ending a long-term relationship is difficult, and it is understandable to feel sorrow and anxiety during this time. During divorce and in its immediate aftermath, you may struggle to adjust to the major changes in your life. However, by practicing good self-care, you can not only survive your divorce but thrive in the next phase of your life. Here are some tips for caring for yourself during and after your divorce:

• Focus on the positive - You are likely grieving the end of your relationship, and this can lead to negative feelings about what you have lost. However, by taking time to remember what you do have and the good things in your life, you can build a more positive attitude, put painful experiences in the past, and move on to a better future.
• Establish a routine - It is understandable to feel adrift and unsure about the future during divorce, so following a standard daily routine can give you a sense of order in your life. This can also help avoid having too much spare time to wallow in negative emotions, which can lead to depression.

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 Posted on March 19, 2018 in Child Custody

If you are a parent who is getting divorced or planning to, you are probably concerned about how you and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse will raise your children. If you plan on raising the kids together through a shared parenting scenario, you should know that there are some unique methods of co-parenting which have helped many families. These growing trends offer an alternative to traditional post-divorce living situations.

Nesting Arrangements

The majority of couples who get divorced end up living separately from each other. The most common living arrangement for parents who get divorced is for children to visit each parent at their home. Some experts find this arrangement to be especially burdensome on the children who are splitting their time between two homes. As an alternative, some parents are choosing to use what some call “the bird’s nest” strategy: The children live in one home and the parents take turns living there. For example, a parent may stay with the children one week in the “nest” home and then the other parent comes to stay with the children the following week. When the parents are not at the nest home, they are living in their own individual home. While many find this co-parenting strategy to be effective, it can also be quite expensive since it usually requires the couple to finance a third home for the children.

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 Posted on March 14, 2018 in Estate Planning

For many, estate planning is similar to doing your taxes. You know you should do it, but you put it off or procrastinate. Estate planning is especially difficult because it forces you to face your own mortality and have what can be uncomfortable conversations with loved ones about a time when you are not around anymore. Creating a comprehensive estate plan is critical to ensuring that your property and assets are distributed according to your wishes and that the end of your life is how you intend it to be.

Unfortunately, only four in 10 American adults have a will or living trust. The other 60 percent will have significantly less control regarding their property and final wishes than those who plan ahead. Luckily, there is no wrong time to start planning for the future, and there are estate planning steps that you can take at each stage of your life.

In Your 40s and 50s

When most people reach age 40, they have a significantly more complicated life than they did at 20 or 30. In addition to creating a will and/or living trust, people in their 40s should also pay close attention to their taxes. A licensed CPA can help you maximize your deductions and minimize your expenses. Some people choose to set up a Health Savings Account at this point in their lives. These types of accounts allow people to use pretax money to pay for healthcare expenses, which can end up saving a significant amount of money.

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 Posted on March 12, 2018 in Divorce

Marriage is hard work, and it requires spouses to form a committed partnership and work together, treating each other with respect and making an effort to put their family’s best interests first. Unfortunately, there are many situations in which one spouse takes advantage of the other and commits acts of abuse designed to give them control in the relationship. While many people are aware of the signs of physical abuse, emotional abuse is often harder to recognize, but it can also be very damaging. If you are unhappy in your relationship, you may want to consider divorce if you are experiencing any of the following signs of emotional abuse:

• Oversensitivity - Abused people are often in constant fear of upsetting their partner or feel that they need to be careful of what they say to avoid provoking anger.
• Criticism - Emotionally abusive people will often tear down their victims in a variety of ways, including blaming them for things that are not their fault, making them feel like they cannot do anything right, making disparaging statements while claiming that they are joking, or offering backhanded compliments.

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 Posted on March 08, 2018 in Family Law

Today, families in the United States come in all varieties. More single parents and unmarried parents are raising children than in the past. Same-sex couples are also raising more children than they did twenty years ago. Families are often blended, with children from several relationships living together under one roof. Grandparents are also increasingly taking the place of biological parents in children’s lives.

Voluntary Relinquishment

There are several ways that grandparents can get custody of their grandchildren. The first way is through petitioning the court for custody of the grandchildren. Both parents of the child must voluntarily relinquish their parental rights to the child unless there is another issue like abuse. Parents may give up the rights to their children for many deeply personal reasons. Sometimes addiction issues or mental health concerns make a parent unable to raise their child. Other times, very young parents relinquish their parental rights so that a grandparent or grandparents can adopt the child.

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 Posted on March 06, 2018 in Estate Planning

It is never too soon to start planning for your future. At every age, there is an opportunity to make estate planning decisions and preparations that will benefit you and your family in the future. The most financially successful individuals among us will tell you that it did not happen by accident. It is important to be aware of your financial situation and to be intentional about the way your plan for the future. At every stage of life, there are some estate planning steps that you should take in order to minimize complications or expense in the future.

Over the next few weeks, we will discuss how you can consider the future, no matter how old you are right now.

In Your 20s

If you have just graduated college or have just entered the workforce, you may think that there is no point in making any financial plans for your future. After all, you may not even have a spouse or children to worry about providing for at this point in your life. However, those who learn to budget their money and effectively manage income and expenses while they are young gain a skill which will last a lifetime.

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 Posted on March 05, 2018 in Divorce

When a couple decides to end their marriage and get divorced, there are a wide variety of legal issues that must be resolved. Determining how to divide marital property is often one of the most complicated aspects of a divorce, especially when spouses own a home together.

In some cases, a couple may decide to sell their home and divide the proceeds, but often, one spouse wishes to retain ownership of the home, especially when they want their children to continue living in a familiar environment and avoid having to transfer to a new school district. If a spouse does not have the financial resources to purchase their former partner’s share of the home, they may want to consider a divorce lien.

Understanding Divorce Liens

When couples utilize a divorce lien, the spouse who will not be living in the house signs a deed conveying the title to the property to the other spouse. The spouse who remains in the house will sign a payable note and a deed of trust to their former partner. This note is known as a divorce lien. The note will specify how the spouse remaining in the home will repay the other spouse. Payment could be made in a lump sum at a future date or through an ongoing installment plan.

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 Posted on March 01, 2018 in Divorce

There is some confusion in the general public as to the extent that a spouse’s adultery can affect a divorce case. Television and movies often show an enraged husband or wife discovering that their partner is having an affair and yelling about how they are going to take the house and have full custody of their children. Although adultery is still frowned upon by society, it is usually irrelevant to divorce proceedings.

No-Fault State

Since the beginning of 2016, Illinois has been what is called a “pure no-fault state.” A no-fault state is one which does not require divorcing couples to report the reason or “grounds” that they are seeking the divorce. In the past, things like mental cruelty or adultery could be reported as the official reason that the marriage ended. Today, all divorcing couples in Illinois as assumed to be divorcing on the grounds of “irreconcilable differences.” More specifically, a divorce will only be granted when “irreconcilable differences have caused the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage and the court determines that efforts at reconciliation have failed or that future attempts at reconciliation would be impracticable and not in the best interests of the family.”

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