Posted on April 03, 2018 in Divorce

Most of us know at least one married couple who are living separately. In some situations, spouses may experiment with a “trial separation” while in others, they are living on their own as they prepare for a divorce. Living separately is a common precursor to divorce, but there are some things you should know about separating before you or your spouse moves out.

What the Law Says

Prior to 2016, the law in Illinois required a couple to live separate and apart for a minimum of six months before they could pursue a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences. The standard requirement, in fact, was two years, but if the spouses agreed, the separation period could be reduced to six months. Today, a couple can only seek a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences in Illinois, but the separation requirement has been eliminated altogether. The law was changed in 2016 to allow couples to pursue a happier post-divorce future without having to simply watch the calendar for months. If the spouses do not agree on the divorce, however, a six-month separation period is considered by the court to be irrebuttable proof that the marriage has broken down beyond repair.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 28, 2018 in Estate Planning

According to surveys, only about 40% of Americans have a last will and testament and much fewer have a comprehensive estate plan. There are many reasons why people neglect to plan for their future in this way. Some people are simply unaware of the ways an estate plan can help protect their wishes and decrease the burden on their family. Others assume that they do not have enough assets or make enough money to qualify for estate planning. The reality is that everyone can benefit from planning for the future using estate planning tools.

They Think They Do Not Need a Will If They Are Young and in Good Health

In movies, wills are only written by characters who have just learned that they have a terminal illness or are otherwise planning to die. This is very misleading. One of the worst times to write a will is when you are in bad health. A person should write a last will and testament while they are still cognitively competent to do so. A will written by a person of questionable mental capacity due to old age, dementia, or another illness is very vulnerable to being contested, or formally disputed in court. Furthermore, there is no need to wait until an advanced age to write a will or create a trust which determines how your assets are distributed after your death. The best idea is to create a will while you are young and to simply update it as your life circumstances change.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 28, 2018 in Divorce

When parents decide to divorce, both they and their children may have difficulty adjusting to the major changes they will be experiencing in their lives. Some growing pains are inevitable as children become accustomed to dividing their time between two separate homes. However, parents can work to provide a good environment for their children by avoiding the following mistakes:

• Involving children in conflict - Even though parents will likely not get along very well during divorce, it is important to avoid arguing in front of children or exposing them to disagreements. This can be very damaging to children, so parents should work to resolve their disputes when children are not present.
• Inconsistency - Parents should work to maintain consistent rules and schedules at both their houses, which will provide children with a sense of security and help them avoid feeling anxious about what to expect.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 27, 2018 in Divorce

During divorce, spouses will work to resolve a wide variety of legal issues through negotiation or mediation, and ideally, they will be able to resolve these issues without the need for litigation in court. At the conclusion of the divorce process, a couple’s final decisions about these issues will be set down in a marital settlement agreement which will be incorporated into their divorce decree. In Illinois, a marital settlement agreement should include the following:

• Division of assets and debts - A settlement will specify how any marital property will be divided between spouses, including real estate property, physical possessions, automobiles, the balances of bank accounts, business interests, and retirement funds or pensions. It should also specify who will be responsible for marital debts.
• Parenting plan - This portion of the settlement will specify how parents will share decision-making responsibility for their children or whether one parent will have sole responsibility in certain areas. It will also detail each parent’s parenting time schedule, including where children will stay on holidays, who will provide transportation, and any other relevant details.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 26, 2018 in Divorce

Divorce is a tough process for anyone. After all, no one gets married with the intent to someday divorce. Women sometimes experience different challenges during divorce than men do. There is no perfect way to end your marriage, but there are some things you can do to minimize your stress and help the process go more smoothly.

Take Care of Your Needs

Women often put other’s wants before their own. Wives and mothers are sometimes so busy looking after others that they rarely stop to think about their own needs. According to the Holmes-Rahe Stress Inventory, getting divorced is the second-most stressful life even a person can experience. Only the death of a spouse is considered to be a more stressful life event. During this time, it is important to charge your emotional battery. Whether that means going to the spa, out to lunch with friends, or sitting in your own backyard with a good book, do not be afraid to take time to de-stress while your divorce is ongoing.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 22, 2018 in Estate Planning

Although it has been nearly 13 years since she passed away, many people still remember the name Teri Schiavo from the famous right-to-die legal case which spanned from 1990 to 2005. Schiavo was only 26 years old when she suffered cardiac arrest which left her in a persistent vegetative state. Although the young woman was alive, doctors explained that she would probably never gain full consciousness.

Schiavo’s husband felt that his wife would not have wanted to be kept alive through machines and fed through feeding tubes and requested that his wife have her feeding tube removed. The woman’s parents fervently disagreed with this plan and battled in court to keep their daughter alive. The case sparked increased interest in advance directive measures that allow a person to ensure their wishes regarding medical treatment will be followed in the event they are incapacitated.

Half of Elderly Hospital Patients Unable to Communicate Wishes

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 20, 2018 in Divorce

Ending a long-term relationship is difficult, and it is understandable to feel sorrow and anxiety during this time. During divorce and in its immediate aftermath, you may struggle to adjust to the major changes in your life. However, by practicing good self-care, you can not only survive your divorce but thrive in the next phase of your life. Here are some tips for caring for yourself during and after your divorce:

• Focus on the positive - You are likely grieving the end of your relationship, and this can lead to negative feelings about what you have lost. However, by taking time to remember what you do have and the good things in your life, you can build a more positive attitude, put painful experiences in the past, and move on to a better future.
• Establish a routine - It is understandable to feel adrift and unsure about the future during divorce, so following a standard daily routine can give you a sense of order in your life. This can also help avoid having too much spare time to wallow in negative emotions, which can lead to depression.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 19, 2018 in Child Custody

If you are a parent who is getting divorced or planning to, you are probably concerned about how you and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse will raise your children. If you plan on raising the kids together through a shared parenting scenario, you should know that there are some unique methods of co-parenting which have helped many families. These growing trends offer an alternative to traditional post-divorce living situations.

Nesting Arrangements

The majority of couples who get divorced end up living separately from each other. The most common living arrangement for parents who get divorced is for children to visit each parent at their home. Some experts find this arrangement to be especially burdensome on the children who are splitting their time between two homes. As an alternative, some parents are choosing to use what some call “the bird’s nest” strategy: The children live in one home and the parents take turns living there. For example, a parent may stay with the children one week in the “nest” home and then the other parent comes to stay with the children the following week. When the parents are not at the nest home, they are living in their own individual home. While many find this co-parenting strategy to be effective, it can also be quite expensive since it usually requires the couple to finance a third home for the children.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 14, 2018 in Estate Planning

For many, estate planning is similar to doing your taxes. You know you should do it, but you put it off or procrastinate. Estate planning is especially difficult because it forces you to face your own mortality and have what can be uncomfortable conversations with loved ones about a time when you are not around anymore. Creating a comprehensive estate plan is critical to ensuring that your property and assets are distributed according to your wishes and that the end of your life is how you intend it to be.

Unfortunately, only four in 10 American adults have a will or living trust. The other 60 percent will have significantly less control regarding their property and final wishes than those who plan ahead. Luckily, there is no wrong time to start planning for the future, and there are estate planning steps that you can take at each stage of your life.

In Your 40s and 50s

When most people reach age 40, they have a significantly more complicated life than they did at 20 or 30. In addition to creating a will and/or living trust, people in their 40s should also pay close attention to their taxes. A licensed CPA can help you maximize your deductions and minimize your expenses. Some people choose to set up a Health Savings Account at this point in their lives. These types of accounts allow people to use pretax money to pay for healthcare expenses, which can end up saving a significant amount of money.

Continue Reading ››

 Posted on March 12, 2018 in Divorce

Marriage is hard work, and it requires spouses to form a committed partnership and work together, treating each other with respect and making an effort to put their family’s best interests first. Unfortunately, there are many situations in which one spouse takes advantage of the other and commits acts of abuse designed to give them control in the relationship. While many people are aware of the signs of physical abuse, emotional abuse is often harder to recognize, but it can also be very damaging. If you are unhappy in your relationship, you may want to consider divorce if you are experiencing any of the following signs of emotional abuse:

• Oversensitivity - Abused people are often in constant fear of upsetting their partner or feel that they need to be careful of what they say to avoid provoking anger.
• Criticism - Emotionally abusive people will often tear down their victims in a variety of ways, including blaming them for things that are not their fault, making them feel like they cannot do anything right, making disparaging statements while claiming that they are joking, or offering backhanded compliments.

Continue Reading ››